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RSL vs LA Galaxy: What we learned

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That stadium was roaring (quacking?) tonight

MLS: Los Angeles Galaxy at Real Salt Lake Chris Nicoll-USA TODAY Sports

What is there to say about this game? I spent the first five minutes ticked and fuming. I was ready to break something fragile. Portland and Seattle got results this week and are crawling up our, um, duck tails in the standings. We needed all the points here. It didn’t look like we’d get them.

I’ll do my best to refrain from duck puns.

But LA were only really able to string together about five minutes of good soccer during this match. Too bad they pulled two goals out of it. But guess what! We have a positive goal differential! We’re +2. We might wind up relying on that goal differential to break some ties as Portland and Seattle have games-in-hand on us. I said to watch them. Keep watching.

And our first hat trick since Javi played for RSL. Those who have spent the year downing on Kreilach, what have you to say now, eh?

It’s been a great run of games. I’m happy. You’re happy. We’re all happy. Sigi isn’t happy: he’s quacking in his boots as his season falls apart.

So here we go. Buckle in, folks. Things are going to get wild.

Overreactions

The RSL duck is a way better Utah State Bird than the seagull. Someone start a ballot referendum or something.

I’m torn about what to do with RSL Soapbox writer & editor Lucas Muller. He’s been touring MLS stadia and non-RSL matches in the west (Portland mid-week and Seattle earlier today). However, the matches he attends aren’t dropping in our favor and I blame him for not booing loud enough. Boo louder.

I have concrete evidence that Beckerman’s finally getting old: according to former student, high school soccer player, and loud fifteen-year-old Megan, Beckerman is the least attractive player for RSL. Once the teenage girls no longer find you—as a professional athlete—attractive, you’re old. Sorry Kyle. Welcome to the ranks of us mere mortals.